Some people think I react unnecessary on small things , some people misunderstood me and some say I "SHOWOFF" too much...
Now what should I do in this matter ..This is the way I am !!!
If only I could describe the awkward state of mind I am in...
Of what is right and wrong for me, I was so sure… I don’t remember quite clearly when I lost my confidence in my decisions... my choices... Of doing something believing THIS is what it should be, albeit, later I might feel I could have done better at that. At least I used to be happy about the fact that at any point of time; I knew what I was doing. And why I was doing it.
Quite unlike what I am today… or should I say what I am in…
Haze. White and pure. Translucent and torturous. I blink at my future, which slyly smiles and dares me act. I wait patiently for the enigma to unfold.
Quagmire. Of unending doubts and confusion. Am too scared to tread the wrong path... too scared of facing dire repercussions. I don’t think I have the mettle to handle that anymore.
Stringed to fate. I pity at myself for my act of submission… to wait for the right time, to wait for the right thing to happen. To wait for anything to happen.
Envious. Of those who know what they are doing; they are all around me, moving on like automatons; with me standing at sidelines, searching for a hint to my life unknown.
Silent. Amidst the clash of rights and wrongs, amidst the din of my own thoughts.
Lost.
Because I don’t know whether the wait is worth it…
Because I don’t know what I am waiting for…
If only...
I guess this happens with everyone at some point of time. As time never ceases to flow, either the situation heals itself or we get used of this constant confusion.
ReplyDeleteThe point is... either way it is going to get better.
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ReplyDeleteNaah...Its not going to be get better....as time pass I found myself trap under this condition and I know something worst is still their to happen now.
ReplyDeleteagree with voice...
ReplyDeletei have already been through several such phases and I think i got used to it .. got comfortable.
not the way i had seen it .. but thats the way it is.
For a change u can fight hard and change it altogether.